What the hell is even “self-care” ?

You’ve heard it, we all have. “Oh you just need a little self-care” or “what’s your self-care routine?” As a mother of four. I find this laughable, seriously? Self-care? You think I’ve got the time to pull out some elaborate, self-care face mask, bubble bath, extravaganza once a week?

Now in my personal opinion, self-care is extremely subjective what may be relaxing to you i.e sitting in the tub, with a face mask on and a bottle of wine. I find time be just a prolonged period of time that I’m wet, and cold within minutes and the bubbles never last oh and the kids will find me. Yes, even if they were put to bed first. So to me that’s a bust, not going to happen, thanks for the recommendations but I’ll pass.

Self-care can be so many different things even if you don’t think it falls under the guise of self-care for someone else it really might be. Not only that, but it changes to meet your needs as you grow as a person. If you asked me at 16 I would have told you. It’s definitely face masks, getting my nails done, and pampering myself with my bestfriend. At 19 I would have to told you. Getting a baby sitter and going out with my friends. Now at the point in life I’m at, I’m going to tell you, it’s laying on my couch with no pants on, eating junk, watching random stuff on YouTube, while I talk my Hubby’s ear off. Reading a book in selince, or something that gives me full on me time. What you need to fill your own self-care desire’s is up to you. Not to say, I don’t enjoy a trip to the hair salon, or gettting my nails done becuase this girl absoulty loves to get those things done… When and if theres time for that one, (if I even get to go to those things by myself that is, I’ve got a six year old little girl so you know she’s trying to tag along.)

Now that being said, Those things fill my-self care needs. But sometimes we need something a little different, yes sometimes we need to zone-in on the physical ones. (I’m talking about physical activity, not physical activity although that works too.) Find something that works for you, if that’s gong for a walk wicked, weight training, or other workouts sweet, dancing around your house just getting movement perfect! But, do something that gets your blood flowing. You may not notice it at first, but it could be the small tweak you need to feel like you’ve taken sometime to take care of yourself.

A shower counts.

I will die on this hill. If you took the time, to get your ass in the shower, wash your body, your hair, the whole getting clean process. That damn well counts, especially if you are a mom. I don’t want to hear “Oh that’s just basics hygiene” because yes you’re right. Do you know what most mothers can’t find the time of day for between looking after their children, their homes, and whatever other things have fallen into their responsibility basket? BASIC HYGIENE , yeah we will brush our teeth. Might as well while you’re in the bathroom making sure your kids are brushing theirs, and yep! I got dressed in clean clothing, because like hell I’m doing laundry to not appreciate a clean shirt… That will likely be ruined by the time I make it from my bedroom to the kitchen but I digress. Finding the time for a shower, and I mean a good one. One where you have time to shave your legs, and wash your hair. One of those bad boys. That right there, counts as a good amount of self-care if you ask me.

I say this for anyone struggling to fit something into the deffintion of self-care, not just the mom struggling thinking she’s not taking time for the “right” self-care. It’s for anyone who doesn’t enjoy the social norm of self-care, your version of it counts too.

So eat a couple Krispy Kreme doughnuts, and watch a murder documentary, go for a run, or a gym session. Get lost in a good book. Take good solid shower, or lay on the living room floor and just melt into nothing but silence. But do WHATEVER feels good and like self-care to you. At the end of the day people put expectations on everything, even the standard for self-care. But, screw that. It’s time to throw that ideal out the window and do what we need to do for ourselves, and not give a damn if the rest of the world would agree with it.