Okay, okay. I know that probably sounds a little rude to just flat out say, and without any context it most definitely is. That doesn’t mean for everything, or to everyone who invites us to do things or to their home. (Depending on the Covid restrictions at time of invite) But let’s just take a minute and break this down. I’m sure at the end of this you will understand why sometimes moms just say no… Or have some excuse as to why we aren’t coming. At least for our family anyways.
Please don’t think that every invite that comes our way gets turned down, because I’m stuck up, to busy, or don’t like you. Most the time it’s for a multitude of reasonings, and I’m probably just as bummed that we aren’t coming because let’s be real. We don’t pack up the whole fam jam and go out often. (Trips to the park, walks, bike rides and visiting grandparents aside) So when something sounds like a lot of fun, but has a lot more cons on the list then pros it’s just not worth all the work in this moms opinion.
Do you really understand what inviting all of us means? No, really do you? I’m not being a jerk but inviting six people to your house is A LOT. Them being small may seem like it makes it not so bad, but it’s the opposite. Yes, their adorable little selves will tell you all the nice things about your house. Point out all the cool things you have, and definitely give you a nice little confidence boost about your home. But… They will touch everything, and they will ask you questions about all of your belongs.
I do promise I fed them before we left, and there’s a %95 chance I also gave them a snack in the car so they wouldn’t ask when we got here if you had any. However, they most definitely will ask you for a snack about 5 minutes after arriving. I probably will not sit and chat with you about all the things going on in life, or catch up with you at all. Because I will be following my toddler around your house so that she doesn’t break anything you own… Or climb your furniture and no it’s not cute. It’s embarrassing, because well one we’re at someone else’s home and I know these kids know how to behave properly. I also know that if they break something I will have to replace it, even if you tell me “not to worry” about it I’m going to because my child, my responsibility.
So why don’t we just go out then? Cool, I’m up for that. How’s the park, a trip to the beach, or somewhere else child friendly. Because as much as I’d love to do some site seeing our, or something like that. Most of the time that’s just not happening for us. And please don’t get me started on those “kid zones” great in theory. Absolutely do able for people with 1-2 children. But when you have 4 of them, and not one of them are at an age to navigate one of those places by them self. (in my personal opinion, do with your children as you see fit.) It’s likely not happening. Now that’s not to say my oldest two will miss out on these opportunities and experiences because obviously there is both myself and my husband one of us can go do these things and the other can stay home with the small children. But don’t ask us to go to some Playdium type place with all four kids in tow like that’s gonna happen. It’s just not reasonable for us. Take pictures we will catch you at the next activity.
What’s fun for you may not be fun for me. That’s right I said it. Yes doing adult things is fun obviously, I want to go out and do these things with my husband and enjoy our time together. That being said though I’ve come to a point in my life, going to the zoo with my kids. Getting to see their faces when they see an animal three times the size of them, and they think it’s the coolest thing in the world will absolutely trump most things if you ask me. It’s kind of you to think of me, when asking if I want to go out to the bar with you on a Friday night. But I’m not coming.. I’m going watch a movie with my kids, maybe play some Jenga put them to bed at a decent time and spend the night relaxing with my husband. That is what’s fun for me.
We would absolutely love to join you out to dinner. Do they serve chicken nuggets? No that’s a serious question. My kids are small chicken nuggets/strips are a must on the menu. Please know, yes my children are well behaved in restaurants. (For the most part, since kids can be pretty unpredictable) You don’t have to worry about them screaming or throwing food. But, they will want to pick off your plate, have you colour the place mat with them. Myself or hubby will be getting up at least 3 times to take someone potty. We wont be staying for desert, oh and kids are brutally honest so expect one of the older two to make a comment/ask a question about someone else in the restaurant. If you hear it please don’t laugh, if it was mean tell them that’s not nice. But, seriously don’t laugh kids are savage, I know it’s hard not to, but we are trying our best to raise decent human beings
A baby sitter? Yeah.. probably not. I’ve got four kids, not many people want to, nor do I want to want to put that kind of responsibility on someone four kids is a lot of kids to watch. Yeah, sometime we will be a child or two short because of grandparents. (Thank god for them wanting sleepovers with their grand babies) that’s probably the best I can do.
Here’s the solution! How about you just come over here? Plain and simple sometimes it’s just a whole heck of a lot easier if you just come here to visit us. There’s six of us, we’re loud, we’re busy, and at least here if something breaks, or someone gets hurt it’s on us.
The door is open, coffee can be made in minutes. You’ve got no one and nothing to impress. You’ll be welcomed but happy little faces, and the enveloping feeling of a home full of love. So maybe next time skip the invite and ask if we’re up for coffee there’s a good chance, I’ve already been planning on telling you to just come over instead anyways.